Crying When Angry During Perimenopause? Apparently That's a Thing

What the heck is this new symptom of perimenopause?

I now cry when I'm angry.

What the French toast?

I've always been a crier.

Sad? I cry.

Happy? I cry.

Hormonal? I cry.

Watch a sentimental commercial with a puppy and a soldier coming home? There's a good chance I'm crying.

But angry crying?

This is new.

And frankly, I don't appreciate perimenopause continuing to add features I did not request.

Apparently My Anger Has Tears Now

My previous experience with anger involved what I can only describe as supernatural strength.

You don't want to help me rearrange the furniture?

FINE. I'll do it myself.

You don't have time to help me take the old freezer out to the garage?

I GOT IT.

Was it a wise decision?

Probably not.

Was that going to stop me?

Absolutely not.

But now?

Ohhhh, now I get angry and tears start rolling down my face.

So there I am looking like a weak little kitten on the outside while on the inside I'm a raging, hot-flashing, born-again Christian trying VERY hard to remember the fruits of the Spirit because the man I love is breathing entirely too loudly.

And instead of articulating actual words...

I cry.

Jesus, take the wheel.

Preferably somewhere with air conditioning where I can sleep through the night and wake up in the magical land of I Feel Normal Again.

The Bridal Shower Meltdown

My mom came over the other day to help me plan my future daughter-in-law's bridal shower.

This is a BIG deal, so of course there were emotions involved.

But I wasn't sitting around thinking about how emotional I was.

I was thinking about everything I needed to get done.

We're planning and talking and making lists when my husband messages me to tell me he isn't going to be able to help with some yard work I need done before the bridal shower.

And I was...

ENRAGED.

Was the situation worthy of this level of rage?

That's really not important to this story. 😂

Because instead of saying what I was thinking...

I started crying.

Not a delicate little tear.

Oh no.

I sobbed like a teenager going through her first breakup.

My mother—a menopause veteran—looked at me like she'd just witnessed something paranormal.

After I went through approximately half a box of tissues, she very patiently asked:

"What's wrong?"

I explained that the evil spirit of perimenopause was upon me and that I apparently needed an exorcism.

She looked at me very seriously and said:

"Sweetie, I am so sorry. I never had it this bad."

Yes, she did.

😂😂😂

I remember.

The mood swings.

The irritability.

The tears.

But you know what?

I'm glad she doesn't remember.

Because that gave me hope.

Maybe this will pass...

and someday I won't remember it either.

Praise the Lord.

Can Perimenopause Really Cause Crying Spells and Irritability?

If you've been wondering what else perimenopause might have in store, I've shared some of the other surprising symptoms I've experienced in Perimenopause Is From the Devil: The Symptoms Nobody Warned Me About.

After this little episode, I had to know:

Is this actually a perimenopause thing, or am I just losing it?

Turns out, emotional changes really can be part of the menopause transition.

ACOG says about 4 in 10 women experience mood symptoms during perimenopause similar to PMS, which can include feeling irritable, tearful, moody, low on energy or having difficulty concentrating. Hormonal changes may play a role, but stress, fatigue, sleep problems and everything else happening during midlife can affect emotions too.

The U.S. Office on Women's Health also specifically lists irritability and crying spells among possible mood changes during the menopause transition.

So am I declaring that perimenopause is unquestionably responsible every time I cry because I'm angry?

No.

But learning that tearfulness AND irritability can show up during this season certainly made me feel a whole lot less crazy.

And a whole lot more understood.

Perimenopause Mood Swings Are No Joke... Except Sometimes They Are

Here's something I'm learning during this whole ridiculous journey:

Sometimes you have to laugh.

That doesn't mean every symptom is funny.

Some aren't.

And if crying, anxiety, anger, sadness or other emotional changes are becoming severe, persistent or interfering with everyday life, please don't automatically dismiss them as "just perimenopause." ACOG notes that depression risk increases during the menopause transition and recommends talking with your health care professional about concerning emotional changes.

But in my day-to-day moments?

Sometimes laughter is how I cope.

Because apparently tomorrow I could wake up with an entirely new symptom that nobody bothered to put in the brochure.

The Good News? This Season Won't Last Forever

What crazy symptom will appear tomorrow?

At this point, your guess is as good as mine.

But since I'm determined to find the good in all of this, here's today's good:

This season won't last forever.

It will pass.

In the meantime, I've got some hilarious stories.

I've got some downright disturbing stories.

I've got women walking through this season right alongside me.

And most importantly...

I've got Jesus.

Praise the Lord for that.

Because there are days when the hot flashes are flashing, the brain isn't braining, the tears are tearing and somebody in my house has the AUDACITY to breathe too loudly...

and I need Jesus.

So if you suddenly find yourself crying when you're actually MAD...

Come sit by me.

We'll cry.

We'll laugh.

We'll turn the thermostat down.

We'll remind each other that we're not losing our minds.

And we'll keep going.

Because apparently this is perimenopause.

And apparently...

we're going to have some stories to tell. 😂❤️